Spirit Connections can be something of a mystery… here we answer some of the most common questions about spirit visits.
Who – who is coming to me? and who am I to be receiving these visits, why does spirit come to me? My answer is simple "spirit comes to you because you have your lights on." Spirit knows those who are able to communicate – they know those who can sense their presence – whether that person knows they can connect with spirit or not… so when spirit needs to make a connection, it looks to see who has their lights on, who is open to seeing them. The question of "who is this spirit wanting to connect with me?" isn't so easy to answer… it could be a relative with a message for you, a spirit guide wanting to give you a wake up call, or a lost soul looking for help. Usually the appearance or the voice or a smell will tell you if it's a relative. If a spirit is attached to a location, it will signal its presence when it feels you in their space, sometimes to frighten you away, sometimes to ask for help. When spirit wants help or to pass a message, it will come to whoever is open to them and closest to their target… Years ago, my roommate's friend came by with some questions for me… all the clocks in her house stopped at 12:10AM, lights had been going on and off, her washing machine filled up with clear water when no one had started it… I asked if someone around her had died recently… sure enough, a good friend had died in a motor cycle accident at that time a few weeks earlier… he had an important message for his wife and our friend was being asked to be the messenger.
What – what should I do when I see, feel or hear spirit around me? If you think you know who this spirit is, greet them as if they were alive… Hey Grandma, good to see you, how are you? Then listen for a response… Ask her for a message and to tell you why she came… sometimes it's just to say hi and let you know she's OK and that she loves you, is around when you need her… occasionally she may have an important message or a warning for you. But, if you don't recognize the spirit, your greeting will be a little different… I usually say something like "hello, who's there? You're welcome to leave a message, but then you must leave." I use all of my senses to determine whether the energy is loving… if it isn't, I call on my guides and angels to remove it… and if it is, I welcome it and again request a message. I will not accept the presence of any energy that is "bossy" or angry… I expect ALL communications to be loving – even when there is a correction being offered by my guides… Your guides may observe some negative behaviour in you, or want you to move in a certain direction, but they are guides, not bosses… it is up to us whether we follow through on their advice or suggestions- it is not OK for them to offer anything more than a loving "I told you so" when we choose to learn the hard way. The best reaction to a spirit connection is to notice the subtle signals, pay attention to the details, and listen – not only for words or thoughts that may come ,but also to your feelings. Everything that goes on in a spirit communication will have some meaning… and message…
When – when will spirit appear? Typically when it has a reason to make a connection, when there is unfinished business here on Earth. Most spirits will attend their funerals or memorial services. There is often a lot of spirit activity around relatives and friends soon after death and during the period of contemplation that most spirits experience after crossing over. So often clients worry when they can't feel their loved one around. They want to know when they can expect a visit, or at least get some sign that they are OK. It is not unusual for a wife not to be able to sense her husband-in-spirit. When the bonds of love are deep, there appear to be barriers between the dimensions – my sense is that this is to prevent the husband from being grounded on the earth plane, or from pulling his wife to the other side with him… it is usually a sign that the partner is expected to move on, trusting that they will reconnect in time… and in time, when the depths of grief have passed, they will often appear in a dream. One of the first things I ask when a client calls about a spirit having invaded their homes is "when did this start? and the next is "what was going on in your home at that time?" Sometimes there has been a death in the family or the neighbourhood that can explain the activity… but often what we think is spirit activity has been confused with come other form of energetic phenomenon… poltergeist activity for example is the result of uncontrolled thoughts and feelings, usually in adolescent children. But cups can fly off shelves, doors can open, mirrors can break, lights go off and on as a result of intense energy that comes from a trauma, a divorce, a terrible fight.. .without realizing it, we release a lot of energy into our environments when we are angry, hurt, in pain or very afraid and this energy can hang around a place and be triggered into action when conditions are right.
Where – where will spirit manifest? The simple answer is that spirit will appear wherever they want when condition are right… . Some spirits never really make it across to the higher dimension and are trapped somewhere between the astral plane and life on earth… these lost souls will manifest as ghosts and will need special help to move on where they belong. Once across, it takes some power, a strong attachment and an open channel for spirit to cross the dimensional barriers so they can manifest their presence somewhere on the planet One of the most common and easiest ways for spirit to connect is through our dreams. But, spirit can appear anywhere… any time … although you probably won't find them around a cemetery, as so many would think… some will stay close to the place where they died, trying to figure out what to do next, where to go… some don't even realize they are in spirit.. Still, lost souls can attach themselves to almost any location or individual that seems familiar to them… many mediums complain about the crowds of lost souls wandering through our hospital hallways.. Especially in the case of a sudden death, an accident, where there has been a dramatic trauma at the point of death, some spirits can be seen hanging around the place where they died for awhile… But sometime what we perceive as ghostly activity is actually the result of some horrific event being imprinted on the energy associated with a particular location…like a movie that keeps playing over and over again when the environmental conditions are just right. This is known as a residual haunting – a playback of a past event. The apparitions involved are not spirits, they are "recordings" of the event. Spirit will typically manifest in places that are comfortable to them – or at events that have some special meaning to them – for example, a father who has passed will very likely be attending his daughter's wedding – even if in spirit…
Why? Why does spirit want to connect? Why does spirit want to connect? Spirit connects for a purpose, usually when there is unfinished business, when there is a need. Often it is just to let their loved ones know that life goes on, that they are still alive and well, if without a body in another dimension. Sometimes they have an important message for us, or perhaps they want us to be ready for a good opportunity coming our way, or they have a warning that another family member is in trouble or will pass soon. Spirit may come to check in on their loved ones, to support them in some ways… a loving grandmother-in-spirit could be found bending over the crib of their newborn granddaughter, giving the child her blessing, welcoming her to the family… If a spirit has gotten stuck on this plane, it will often attach itself to a familiar location or object… you might never know it is there until you do something to disturb it. I have heard of some interesting stories of painted portraits that take on a life of their own once moved from their homes. Renovating an old home can also bring the ghosts out – letting you know that they aren't happy about being bothered. They may try to scare you away, but if you will take time to acknowledge them and even get them involved in the changes, they will calm down. Whatever their reason for connecting, the way to respond to them is to acknowledge their presence and to ask for their purpose in coming. If you have encountered a ghost in your home, respond the way you would with a lost soul, tell them to look for the light, to follow the light, that it will take them where they need to be. It may take some effort, smudging and blessing a home can be very effective in getting a spirit to move on. In some cases, you may need a professional to help you clear the energy… or you can simply decide to share your space with them.. if you set some rules, very often a ghost will be happy to co-operate.
How does spirit appear? Spirit may not have the power or strength to appear in front of you, but there are many ways that they can signal their presence… a sudden wave of cold or a cold spot in a room is often a sign of their presence. Lights that go off and on, pictures that suddenly fall off a wall, glasses that seem to fly off a counter, objects and keys that disappear and reappear, are just a few of the ways that spirit lets us know when it's nearby.. Spirit will appear in dreams, seeking your attention through smells or sounds.. – you get a whiff of grandpa's pipe when he wants to let you know he's with you… or you may hear footsteps or doors opening or closing…… A butterfly may appear seemingly out of nowhere just as you are thinking of a loved one in spirit… Nature is an easy vehicle for spirit, so if you're looking for a sign that a spirit is OK, be attentive to your environment. Pay attention also to any odd behaviour from the pets in your home – if they are focused on something that seems to be hanging around a corner of the ceiling, they are probably reacting to the presence of a spirit.