On Being a Squeaky Wheel

If we want help from our guides and angels we must ask for it – and be specific about what we want… there is a reason for this “rule”… They are trying to teach us that speaking up is how we get what we want in life, period. Yet, I find so many of my clients are tongue-tied, thus their lives have stalled, they are stuck in jobs they dislike and relationships that don’t work any more.

Perhaps it’s my curiosity, perhaps it’s just my impatience, a driving need for progress, but I always have a lot of questions and requests… fortunately, speaking up has worked to my great advantage over the years.

The squeaky wheel in me became very obvious in college when a young man approached me to ask if he could sit beside me in our accounting classes. I knew him through the group of us that hung in the cafeteria between classes, so I said, “sure, but why?” I couldn’t help but laugh when he said “because you ask all the questions I just think about…” A few years later, I was transferred to our Western offices by the oil company I worked for and was quickly fast-tracked into a management position in systems… I had been hired with 6 of the top students from our  class. Maureen, a lovely Asian woman who used to teach math in Singapore had the highest marks of any of us in the group… I lost touch with her when I was transferred west, so I was very happy to see her at the door of my office one day… but she was in a temper, marched to my desk demanding to know “how did this happen?” She was distressed to discover that I had been promoted so many levels above her… so I sat her down and spoke about being the squeaky wheel… I told her how I had eliminated job after job by asking questions about it and then finding ways of doing the tasks much more easily… and how every time I ran out of work, I went to my boss to ask for more… I also suggested that she go talk to her manager and Human Resources to let them know that she wanted to be promoted, that she was ready for more responsibility…. a few months later I heard that she got that promotion she wanted… and a few years later I heard that she was  the head of her department. Well done Maureen, you learned to speak up.

Speaking up is about making your needs known, standing behind your work, your beliefs, your thoughts and ideas… it’s about being heard, being noticed… if you want a promotion or a raise, you usually need to ask for it… while a certain amount of modesty and humility are always necessary, no matter what we do in life, a willingness to ask for recognition is often as necessary… When you are doing quality work, when you are more than meeting expectations for your position, and doing so consistently over time… speak up – it is OK to ask to be noticed.

One of the hardest places for most of us to speak up is in relationship. We’re afraid to rock the boat, to be rejected… to be alone… so we don’t ask the hard questions or speak up about what we really think and feel… hoping that one day, s/he will change… but unless you speak up, unless you ask for change, it’s not likely to happen.

There are times though, when it can be dangerous to speak up in relationship.  In fact, there are times when it is critical to “go quiet.”  If you are in an abusive relationship, there is no sense in confronting your abuser – but there is a lot of sense in quietly finding help, making a plan and then being very alert for any opportunity to escape. Another instance when it is essential to go quiet is when emotions are running high… continuing to speak up will only escalate the conflicts… the best solution in such a situation is to withdraw for a bit, give everyone time to calm, and you time to ground and clear your head.

A willingness to speak up is key to your progress in life… being a squeaky wheel can be a real asset… but to be effective, you must choose the time and place and frame the request in such a way that you can be heard… in a sense, you must earn the right to speak up… for example, Maureen’s performance was outstanding, had been from her first day on the job – she had earned the right to speak up, to ask for more.

Whether in our careers and business lives, or in our personal lives, the more you question and request, the more you reach for understanding and clarity, the more likely you are to succeed…

Note: This is the second in a series of articles on opening up. See the first article, Say What You See, and watch for the third on How To Speak Up – and Be Heard. to come soon.

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It all began many years ago… at lunch with a friend, I thought to tell a story of something that had once happened to me. I was barely into the story when my friend burst out with “how did you know? how do you do it?” “know what?” I was puzzled, the story seemed to have come out of thin air. But, I had hit a button, a problem that she’d been struggling with… my story provided the very answers she’d been praying for. I didn’t realize it, but my psychic self was in operation in that moment…

That was the first time I noticed a pattern that I soon learned to recognize and accept, especially when I’m reading the cards.

The imagery and symbolism of the Tarot tends to trigger immediate reactions within your psyche. Old soul memories, ancient knowledge rises to the surface of your being from the depths of your unconscious or subconscious self… the Tarot, like your dreams, is a way of talking with your soul, connecting with your higher self.

It’s that time of year when I look for lessons from my garden…

My garden teaches me to give things time to grow and mature. Some years ago, I found an interesting little bush growing along the fence. I thought I should pull this volunteer, but it was pretty, so I decided to give it time to show itself…  a week ago I was surprised to see that little bush, now a small tree, in full bloom, covered with lovely pink flowers. A visit to a local nursery proved that I had a crabapple tree in my garden – and that is was worth almost $100.  I’m so glad I gave it time to grow! It makes a beautiful addition to the back garden.

Patience and time do more than strength or passion. Jean de La Fontaine

Giving things time – patience - and taking time are the key lessons coming from the garden this year …… I am planning some changes in the back gardens… the big old maples in the backyard make growing grass a huge challenge, so we’re giving in to nature… we’ll fill in some of the empty spaces with ground covers and dig up some large sections of the patchy grass for a hosta garden…… but this is a big project, I need to think on it, to take it in baby steps and since we are on a limited budget,  I am taking my time about getting started…

In today’s one-touch world, we are not accustomed to giving things time… we have been conditioned, especially in recent years, to expect instant gratification of our wants and needs…

But that instant satisfaction isn’t always possible – or even desirable… Clients are often disappointed when I tell them they need to give a relationship time to develop, or that they need to give themselves time to heal before looking for that next love… when I tell them it might be as much or two or three years before that special someone appears, the usual reaction is “oh, no that’s such a long time to wait.”  But time flies when you are having fun… there are a lot of ways to make those years rich in experience, to use the time productively…

The strongest of all warriors are these two — Time and Patience. – Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace

The same principles apply when starting a career or a new business, or any new project… We need to give ourselves time to grow and mature in our new roles… we need to “pay our dues,” to gain the experience and add depth to our knowledge base… If we are willing to give ourselves time and patience, success will come naturally, at the perfect time.

Here are some interesting quotes to get you thinking about taking time…

“Take time to deliberate; but when the time for action arrives, stop thinking and go in.” – Napoleon Bonaparte

Time cools, time clarifies; no mood can be maintained quite unaltered through the course of hours. – Mark Twain

Time heals what reason cannot.  ~ Seneca

Time is the great physician. – Benjamin Disraeli, Endymion

Time is a face on the water. – Stephen King, Wolves of the Calla

Time is a created thing. To say “I don’t have time” is to say “I don’t want to.” - Lao Tzu, O Magazine, Jan. 2007

And one of my favourites: Among life’s regrets is all the time wasted being early for everything.  – Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com

Once you acknowledge that humans are all spirits housed in a body, new forms of communications become possible…as spirit, we are not confined to the physical dimension in order to have a chat with another spirit. The same dynamics apply to communicating with spirits on the other side, as for communicating with spirits on this…. it is simply a matter of putting out a respectful loving call, a request for a heart-to-heart – and listening.

The technique is simple. You can easily make a soul to soul connection if you follow these steps:

• Find a quiet place to sit, make sure feet are flat on the floor, take a little time to settle, to relax your body, get comfortable and get very present, notice the sounds and smells, the movement of the air in the room.
• Close your eyes, and take three or four big deep breaths, deep into your belly… in through your nose, out through your mouth. As you breathe, think of someone or something you love, feel the loving feelings filling your heart chakra.
• Then visualize the person you want to speak with and put out the call… for example “Dad, would you please come to talk with me. I’m upset. I want to know why you seemed to give up in the last years of your life.” Then give the soul, or spirit or Higher Self of the individual a little time to time to collect him or herself and enliven the image you have been holding of them.
• When you feel or notice some movement or shift in the person you are seeing in your mind’s eye, open up, share your feelings, say all of the things you have wished to be able to say face to face… as lovingly as you can… and listen…. notice how you you feel, what thoughts come to you, how the person you are imagining is reacting… these are all clues or answers, responses to your communications… trust that your imagination knows what it’s doing, that whatever response you are getting is coming from the soul of the person you are imagining.
• As you end the communications, tell the person you are imagining that you love them, (even if you’re hurt or angry) thank them for coming and being willing to speak heart-to-heart, give them a hug and let them go…
• Keep your eyes closed for a few minutes longer as you come back to yourself, breathe quietly, think of what you have just shared, what you heard and saw, let it all register with your mind and body…
• Then watch for some shifts in your relationship with that person… they may be subtle, manifesting over time as opposed to overnight, but they will come.

You can use this technique for connecting with a loved one on the other side, for sending an apology to someone you haven’t seen in years, for healing a relationship, even settling an argument, or trying to get through to someone who is mentally or emotionally unbalanced… but be careful… it is important that you approach this form of communication with love in your heart, and healing on your mind… it is OK to express your anger through the communications, to share your feelings of resentment, frustration or even fear… but this forum is all about providing a loving platform for souls to share and to grow… if you are doing your best to listen from your heart, at some point you will feel the anger and hurt dissipating. Then you are ready to share that hug and to move on.

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they are prepared to go to war to gain the recognition they think they deserve….

While the US is probably not in any real danger of attack, I do feel that South Korea, Japan or the Philippines very well may be…  North Korea has a point to make… and intends to some time around April 15th, to celebrate Kim Jong-un’s birthday. We have been concerned  about North Korea’s aggressive tendencies since before Kim Jong-un’s father died… (See a history of our comments about N. Korea in our annual predictions, and most recently our monthly predictions at the end of this article.)

Kim Jong-un is a megalomaniac…a man with an inflated sense of self-esteem who overestimates his powers. What is scary about this man is that while he lacks any real understanding of the current worldview, he is crafty and has made some strong alliances with  countries like Syria and Iran to supply nuclear power… and even though they are starving, his people believe in him.

The saber-rattling at this time, serves a number of purposes… the missile launch is something of a product display for those countries that have been purchasing nuclear know-how and equipment from North Korea.  He is also wanting to show off to his people, give them something to celebrate on his birthday. And perhaps most importantly,  it is an attempt to establish some position on the world stage and to create fear in what he perceives are his enemies, the US and any country that supports them.

I see him beating the war drum with one hand, while the other is reaching out for aid, for acknowledgment and acceptance, as well as for trade…

When I draw cards on this situation, I am seeing that there will be delays, but then there is some form of attack probably within the next week.  But I don’t know that it will have the effect that they expect… a sense that N. Korea has not yet fully mastered the technology… and perhaps also that this missile can be diverted… I have a sense of a big bang and then a big splash…

Kim Jong-un wants to be seen and heard… fortunately, the universe seems to be conspiring to prevent him from causing any real pain at this time… however, if our leaders were wise they would begin now to make some serious efforts to disarm him. This event serves as our second warning… let us act now to avoid disaster in the future.

Says Anatara:

Says Lisa

• in 2009 _Cherie Dreams and Prophecies
• in our 2010 predictions we noted a concern over their building nuclear weaponry
• in 2011, “deposing the mad kings“
• Lisa in her 2013 predictions
• A note on our 2012 predictions... When I heard of North Korea’s failed missile launch, I was reminded of a note in my 2012 predictions: “A dangerous man comes to the fore …. dark-haired… makes a rash impulsive move… (I am thinking this could be the young leader of North Korea, Kim Jong-un)… the good news is that his impulse is not well-thought out and will likely fail to give him the power he anticipates” I’m sure heads rolled over this debacle… The trouble is that this young man will go to any length to prove his power. This is not the first of his very public and quite dangerous mistakes, and won’t be the last.
•  In our April forecast

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